What a good question to start out with. I would honestly hope and pray that most of you would say that you are not satisfied. I mean, if you are satisfied, are you completely content with where you are? Or why are you satisfied?
I hope I never become completely satisfied and content with where I am in life. Simply put, that would just mean that I would be okay living a mundane life and not seeking more. Not seeking to become a better wife, a better mother, a better daughter, a better friend, not desiring a deeper and closer relationship with my Lord and Saviour.
I have really been contemplating these questions a lot lately. I truly desire to change. I am and continually am trying to become a more compassionate wife. I must confess that that is one of my biggest downfalls in life. I am just not a very merciful and graceful wife and mother. I want to change that drastically. I want to come to my husbands side when he is not feeling well and sit down and pray with him and serve him till he is better.
Wouldn't Jesus do that? I am far from that point but I honestly desire that. I want to snuggle with my children more and show them so much more love and affection when they have fallen down or gotten a "boo-boo." I want to parent my children the way Jesus "parents" us. He cherishes us and desires us and is gentle with us.
'But when Jesus saw it, he was indignant and said to them, "Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God.' Mark 10:13-15
I have recently been considering a new way of disciplining our children. I have to be brutally honest. Being transparent isn't always the easiest but I feel that for whomever reads this: perhaps it will, in some way or another, allow you to learn from my mistakes.
Losing my temper and patience with my three precious children is something that I have done way more than I would like to have done. It's so hard to be consistent in disciplining when you are just plain exhausted. When your three year old wakes up in the middle of the night at least once and you do not do well functioning like that... it makes it hard. I am at least exercising to give me some more sanity and energy (but that's a whole other store).
Obedience is something Makenzie, my almost 5 year old, has a rough time with. Perhaps it's because we have tried several different ways of disciplining her. Since she's the oldest, she's the guinea pig. Or perhaps it's just the verbiage and the tone we use with her. I am just beside myself sometimes b/c we cannot get her to listen to us. We have to ask her 5 times sometimes to do one thing. She is a hard-headed little girl but is so full of life and energy. She will be a leader someday! She embraces affection so much.
Because I have to ask her several times to do things, I am at my wit's end with her. Thus, resorting to screaming: "MAKENZIE, I HAVE TOLD YOU AT LEAST 5 TIMES TO COME HERE AND I MEAN IT!!! IF YOU DON'T COME HERE BY THE COUNT OF 3, YOU WILL BE GETTING YOUR BOTTOM SPANKED!!" I am tired of this. Beyond tired! I want to change badly. I really need to tame my patience. But I know that I cannot do this on my own. So easily I resort to my own control but this time, I know that it will have to be with other's accountability and most of all, God.
If you, yes, you who are reading this has any advice on disobedience of a child and having them obey better or just listening to what you ask them to do the first time... would you mind sharing a bit with me? Thanks a ton.
I hope and pray that by this time next year I will be able to declare that I have changed and am much better for it. I pray that I will be able to say that my patience for the children has magnified and that I am so much more compassionate. Will you hold me accountable? Will you send me a message from time to time asking me how I am doing?
There is always more to life when you desire to be more, to serve more, to give more, to simply not be content and satisfied, to live out of the love that our Jesus has given us.
Jesus looked at them and said, "With man it is impossible, but not with God. For all things are possible with God." Mark 10:26-28
Hey Veronica,
ReplyDeleteEven though we only have one child so far (and he is almost 2 yrs old), I have felt similar things about discipline. He is definitely old enough to understand and obey- he is sometimes openly defiant and gets as close as he can to disobedience. You mentioned that you ask your kids several times to obey before disciplining them. I recently read a book- Shepherding Your Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp. It is excellent in that it draws your focus back to reasons for discipline- bringing your child to the point of realization that they are sinners before God (not just before you) and that your job is to bring them into submission to God's will. Anyway- he explains it way better than I just did. His philosophy is that you give a command once and if they do not obey quickly and with a good attitude (maybe for older kids), then they have disobeyed and should be disciplined. I have found this true for us. When we get lax and forget to discipline right away (giving commands several times) it becomes frustrating and that's when I have to deal with anger. Usually I'm not that frustrated the first time I give a command. Also, your kids know that you will not tolerate disobedience. They CAN do it. If you haven't read this book, I would recommend it for you. I'm not saying that I've arrived or anything. I still have very frustrating days, but I think he points us parents in the right direction.
Mollie K (your cousin)